We all know that just about every woman, or every person for that matter, has something about themselves they just don’t like. Women more commonly admit it, because we tend to be a little more superficial than men. But I think collectively, we all wish we had a magic wand that could change our imperfections.
Typically, I am a fairly confident woman. I am confident in my work and I am confident in the way I get tasks done. But, physically, I am far from confident. My lack of self-esteem and my issues with body image is an entirely different post. But, I will say, there are 5 areas of my body that I wish I could change/fix. Two of those things being my smile (teeth) and my skin (complexion/clarity).
When I was younger, I sucked my thumb….ALL THE TIME! I didn’t stop sucking my thumb until I was 16 (don’t judge me). All those years of thumb-sucking had a negative effect on my teeth; or at least I think it has. I’ve seen the way some people’s teeth look after years of thumb-sucking and I never wanted to be that person. A persons mouth is the first thing you notice on them. I, myself, stare at people’s mouths as I’m talking to them. Luckily, I stopped sucking my thumb early enough that my teeth have naturally fixed themselves. They aren’t picture-perfect or “braces straight” but they are decent. Yet still, I’ve always been self-conscious of them. Over the past few years, people have told me that I have a beautiful smile. Strangers have come up to me and said this as well. I always thought they were blowing smoke up my ass, so I never fully accepted the compliment. BUT, about a week or so ago, someone asked me if I ever had braces. At first, I thought he was trying to crack on me, so I asked him if he was serious. He said he was, then he told me he was wondering because my teeth were so straight……
I almost hit the floor. I don’t think I’ve ever had anyone say that to me. It definitely took me by surprise, but it was somewhat relieving to hear. Especially considering that I thought everyone looked at me and saw something completely different, something bad. Perception is a mother!
To top that, there was another breakthrough last week when I did a facial practical. The industry I work in oftentimes requires me to get facials or massages in order to bring a new esthetician or massage therapist on our team (I know, what a hard life! Lol!). I’m always skeptical about getting the facials because I know they have to look at my skin in depth and I’m always expecting to hear the worse about my skin! Since having my son, my skin hasn’t exactly been as “flawless” as it once was. It’s not as smooth or blemish free. I don’t get the sleep I should, so the dark circles around my eyes are a bitch. But last week when I received a facial from a prospective new esthetician at our location, she went on and on about how beautiful my skin was, how clear it was, how flawless it was. She wasn’t the first person to say this to me over the past few weeks, but to come from a professional meant so much more. Just like with my teeth, I thought my skin was in horrible shape. To hear the opposite is quite uplifting! People often tell me I’m beautiful, but just like needing to hear it from a professional, I wouldn’t believe how beautiful I am unless it came from someone who I myself was absolutely in love with; because if they look at me even a smidgen of how I look at them, I must be something special! Sad part is, I shouldn’t need anyone else to validate how I should naturally feel about myself. But in this day and age, in this society, it’s hard not to.
So, after these two incidents occurred, I thought to myself, “maybe I’m not that bad after all. Maybe I should give myself a little more credit!” I think I’m very hard on myself and I have this perception of what I should look like; of what perfection is supposed to be. But truthfully, who is the decider of what perfection is and what it looks like? I have to be happy with myself…bottom line! If nothing else, I can look at these imperfections and say: this is what makes me a LIMITED EDITION! The old saying goes, “how can you love anyone else if you can’t love yourself?” That’s so true. Everyday I need to take a closer look at myself and look from someone else’s perspective. When I’m having a bad day and being hard on myself for something I can’t change, I need to embrace it and realize there’s someone out there who will love everything about me, just as I should. And when I find that person, I better hold on tight! It’s not everyday that you find someone who will take you as you are. Someone like that is considered a rare specimen in my book. Better catch em while they last!
XOXO, TJ